sometimes the game just cannot be beat. It is sometimes a scientific impossibility due to the arrangement of aces and 5s and sometimes that king is over the queen and theres nothing you can do, theres just nothing you can do.
and you can shout and cry and sob and fell sick and tell everyone or tell no one or be silent all together for the rest of your life because that king, that stupid ridiculous fucking king was over the queen and you couldn't get around it.
and you just become an avid observer, obsessing over all the things youve lost so far and all of a sudden life is sad, something always past. so you look at some photos and wonder why when you were 17 you were always so angry and why your best friend hasnt answered you calls in the last 9 months while youve been pregnant with belly full of battles lost. and it all adds up into something called defeat.
and so all there is left to do is quit this unbeatable game and start a new one, where the queen is on top and you have a chance to win.
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PARALLAX - The difference between what is seen through the viewfinder and what the camera records on film, caused by the viewfinder being separate from the camera lens. The difference between photography and vision itself is the parallax between what you see and what you choose to see.
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